Tonight is like that gut wrenching feeling. I wanted to make you friends dinner, cakes, posters and cards. They didn’t want that- i let my feelings get hurt- probably like my work party folks felt like when I ditched the soirée. (Rumor has it they bought a cool red leather computer bag lol) I have had the best friendship, love, compassion and caring from neighbors R and J for many years. After we purchased the house back then, turns out they were truly family, Grandma’s brothers son and daughter-in-law. They have always been like a mom and dad to me. Helping me start the stupid lawnmower, coming to C and C dance recitals, supporting me when I was unemployed and taking care of Carolynne. Let me tell you, not many show up to help you for that. These new renters- Lucky people, far more than they even realize are renting R and J’s house, as they move another stage in their mountain house. I want them to be happy, I love them, I want to have them stay here and love them more and help them in this stage in their life. Selfish selfish, and I should be more ashamed. I’m not. I’ve been sick with dread at the change, marking “x”es on the calendar. They would look out the window to make sure I got home okay, feeding our cats when on vacay. Helping jump my car when I left the lights on. The only thing I keep thinking- we don’t have pictures of us all together. Random. February 11 sucks. I love R and J so, but gotta let ‘me go.


